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The first duty of love is to listen.

PAUL TILLICH
Only within burns the fire I kindle.
My heart the altar.
My heart the altar.


POEM OF A BUDDHIST NUN

Silence

Silence is a path into a place where one is not in charge but simply is. It is a discipline that for some is spiritual. It is integral to meditation, contemplation, and is often part of one’s prayer life. Regardless of the cultural or religious approach, silence brings one to a deeper place of awareness and experience.

This “noise” of the external world causes inner noise which stands in contrast to the natural “silence” of the inner world. What could be more hopeful to the aging than finding that the most important journey of life is an inner one taken in silence? What makes us so needy that we fill the spaciousness of potential silence with words?

Because patients with histories of pervasive negative emotion experience tension and anxiety medical complications may arise. In some cases doctors recommend meditation-like practices in addition to or in lieu of pharmaceutical intervention. The reason for this is that the body has a tendency to become tense and rigid when experiencing emotions like anger, jealousy, resentment, revenge, contempt and fear. Deep relaxation has been proven to alter tension, as does focusing on attitudes and behaviors of generosity, unselfishness, trust, respect and love.

Most of the life-span is spent with an inclination toward external preoccupations. Family, career and socio-economic concerns take center stage in defining one’s place in the world. This “noise” of the external world causes inner noise which stands in contrast to the natural “silence” of the inner world. The later years of older adulthood are spent less in worrying about the outside world and how one fits, and more in developing an inner awareness of the changing body and the finiteness of life. If one has spent little effort on self understanding and reflection in one’s life, emotions like fear and dread are more likely when life begins to shift because of limitations and loss.

Meditation, prayer and contemplation, offer a journey into the inner life, an inner life that can never be fully known. Every day there is something new to be revealed, a new dimension to life that can lead to deeper understanding. What could be more hopeful to the aging than finding that the most important journey of life is an inner one taken in silence? It requires nothing of the traveler but presence and silence. It opens the door to a level of self discovery that an aging person may not have imagined.

Silence does not come naturally to many. Much time with others is spent talking and chattering, not listening or sharing silence. What makes us so needy that we fill the spaciousness of potential silence with words? From what are we hiding? Of what are we afraid? To be silent and still is the call of meditation, contemplation, and some types of prayer.

The previously know external world recedes during aging calling for a new relationship with the self. A practice of silence can improve not only one’s health, but one’s relationships by making words and listening more precious. More important, silence brings one to an acceptance and a sense of peace about the great silence that is to come.